There is a very thin line between getting validated by someone and letting someone define you.
Nevertheless, both depend on another person’s opinion of you which is contrary to the most popular preaching topic revolving nowadays isn’t it?
To be precise, at this point in time you might’ve come across numerous articles, people, videos telling you how important your unique individuality is. How it certainly makes you different from everyone else in the crowd.
There is another side to it that no one really speaks about.
These people that make up the society also want you to fit in the norms and you just like any other individual out there thrive on validation.
Validation; it is like a mental rewarding system.
A system wherein people essentially ‘praise’ each other. But too much of anything is bad right?
Rightly so, when validation gets out of hand, people feel too entitled to define you.
And again, the factor of hypocrisy sneaks in. You want to be unique and yet you need to be validated by another individual that might as well be nothing that you are.
But that isn’t your fault. Not all of it at least.
Maybe the problem lies in the deep rooted psychology of us wanting to be more than what we are.
Maybe, the chase to be more is what is making us less.
Despite the fact that you don’t actually belong anywhere or to anyone, not even your parents for that matter. They brought you into this world but you don’t actually ‘belong’ to them.
We don’t believe in that. We believe that we need people because that’s where we belong and that is how we belong. But in that belief system we let go of what we actually are because we all want to be an ideal human being.
Although, there is no ‘ideal’ human being.
There is no set bench mark till date, at least, of who is ideal. There is no 10/10 person out there.
So why go after the validation after all?
Why let people define you as smart or dumb because everyone is racing against themselves in this race. You just need to be better than what you were yesterday.
Getting a 99% doesn’t define you as smart and getting a 50% doesn’t actually define you as dumb. Those are just integers, it’s is really on you if you will let that 99% validate you or that 50% define you.
Don’t just let someone dim your luminescence in the name of validations. There is no right or wrong way to be you.